Our Grand Music Recital

It wasn't that stressful actually.

But my brother's laptop didn't work because Ryuki fell the laptop.

Our problem was, how can we take care Ryuki while we do our perspective job, since our neighbor

can't take care of him. I was kinda worried because he might shout or what during the recital.

But thank God *heartily* that he fell asleep until the program ended.

phew, what a relief.. hehehe!!

After the recital, my mom planned that we should visit our grandfather to Antique,

and we did a stressful travel, 

but thank God none of us get sick...

We had our fellowship, and I also learned what my grandpa said, some of his words of wisdom..

and we had our testimony regarding our lives before year 2013 ended.

As we went back home, at the van, I kept on thinking about my son, my husband, my friends, about me..and everything..

Most especially that I really would like to put up a restaurant, like a mini restau ones...

And I prayed that God would help me, and touch my heart not to be lonely or sad anymore.

Skype

Yeah, at last I meet my Aunt via Skype, and she also wanted to see my Son and so she did.

We talked a lot, and showed Ryuki how smart he is...

And also my husband, and my son Chat together.. Hehehe!

they look cute..

I Really Need to Talk to You

It's been years that I'm depressed for some reasons, but not always.

But when the time I am, I really want to talk to someone.. 

Who can keep secret, who can understand me, who can listen up to me,
who can make me feel the assurance..

I tried to pray, and just hoping just in my dreams I can talk to Him.. 

I tried talking to my husband and let my feelings out, but it seems when I try to share
and/or let him know about me, some of my ideas, my feelings,
he seems doesn't understand me wholly.

I cried this night because I felt hopeless of talking to God.
Just in my dreams, I wish.. 
but why..

I need a friend who is always there for me, but no one of em can't.

All I am thinking now is Him. Always been.

I desperately want to talk to Him, just for a minute.

I Get It OKay?

It seems mu husband doesn't really needs me.

Ever since since the day I was pregnant he didn't say or mentioned

that he really needs me..

Because he needs his friends more than me and Ryuki.

It really pissed me off, and I started to untagged myself when he tagg me
some of his posts and photos because, really, i feel like it's invain.

It's like, there is no need pa magpaka plasti pa sa akon...

it's just he doesn't know how much he hurts me very bad.

I Met My Old Friends

Mags and Jean just had a baby girl. And I was invited to their house.

So I saw Reznel, Jerol, Bea and Coi2x others, but they were not complete like Gerald wasn't there.
But I had fun because I miss our bonding especially playing HoN..

I was shocked because Emman's Ex Girlfriend was there, and we made good friends, yet I don't care about their past... And besides she has a husband and a baby girl.

Good thing I have this Friend

Good thing I have this friend named Jean..She also have a baby ,1 month old.We have the same situation but almost.

Good thing that she tells me all of her problems because we have the same situation.I don't share problems to others unless they have been there.

So we talked and talked and I also share my problems to her between me and Daichi.I told him about his attitude and how many time he hurted me and his pride and how I don't want to care anymore because I don't want to get hurt.

Pissed off

It's been alomst 2 years I'm taking care of Ryuki, my son.

And it's been unfair to me because it's me all the time I'm taking care of him.

My husband doesn't do much cause we don't live the same house.
So, i'm the one who has been anchoring all the problems. I also don't know if he treats him like a real son.
He just made me pissed off when Ryuki is crying and he doesn't do much to make other attention.

What makes me mad is when he always say that I'll just take a rest and he will do all the care,
but no.. He can't. It's still me the one who feeds him, bathe, do the milk, etc.
I can't even sleep well but he does.

Well he is also thankful because we are not together and now he is in Japan.. 
Looking for work.
Pissed me off before he went to Japan, he doesn't have a full time bonding with ryuki.
Like, feeds him, bathe whatsoever. None.
It made me turned off a bit.

It's like I don't want to talk to him anymore when he gets to Japan.
He didn't even say thank you for what I've done to him before he went.